God spoke to me last week that He will spend my lifetime loving me.
Francis shared such a timely, timeless, sure word worth sharing.
Tag: Church
Remembering Jesus
Sometimes, despite hearing bible verses about fixing our gaze on Jesus or thinking about heavenly things, our minds can still get so wrapped up in doing good and being responsible. We can prioritize our to-do list and things to take care of. Not only that, we see and observe our shortcomings relationally or in character. And then, in God’s mercy, when we stop for a moment, a mere minute. He reminds us of himself. “Christ has already accomplished the purpose for which the law was given. As a result, all who believe in him are made right with God.” Romans 10:4
So often, my mind fills with the ways I have not achieved, accomplished, or lived out that which God has called me to. I find it feels like, on a daily basis, that I am stagnant and have controlled my environment enough for peace and a measure of predictability, and yet he doesn’t feel near. And so, when I thirst for consolation for life in the spiritual sense again, I am reminded of something that Christ accomplished that I never will be able to achieve of my own effort or stubborn persistence, being made right with God.
Even if I was disciplined in every area of my life, I would bear much fruit and with that, much reward, but I would not earn his affection. I would not achieve reconciliation. Despite this, it is not a reason not to become more disciplined, to learn, to grow, to listen, and to seek. I just have to make my peace that God has already given me the cup of salvation, complete and whole, from the work he accomplished through his suffering. I then remember Jesus in the equation of my own self-evaluation.
My acceptance has already been paid for. Christ’s suffering was not incomplete. God is not looking for me to become my own savior. Striving cannot achieve righteousness; that’s not how Heaven has designed our relationship with Himself. I am still on milk, infant and young. I cannot get over the constant wave of his good news crashing repeatedly on the shore of everything my independence tries to resist, preserve, and build.
And yet, without me asking, without me yielding and surrendering, not letting myself off the hook, he comes to me in kindness. He approaches me with dignity, respect, honor, and truth. He reminds me again and again of what my spirit and brain seem to forget so quickly, like trying to hold sand or water in my hand, that he is good. He is for me. He enjoys me. He likes me. He wants me to be happy. He wants me to enjoy my life. To be whole. To be known and celebrated.
I have value. I have gifts. I am a blessing. I have been adopted into his family. I have a home, and I belong in Him. For some reason, I always feel like I choose to remain standing on the threshold of the entryway. I’ve been invited into the party of heaven. I can see it happening; I know I am welcome, but rather than participate, I linger at the door. I would rather be nowhere else outside this place, but I have not yet allowed myself to stay seated and remain comfortable in his love for me. I cannot tell you why. I’m just hoping that when the door to this party shuts I am on the right side. Just accepting the access I’ve been granted is my minimum standard. That heaven will tolerate my presence because of his sacrifice, but I didn’t do much with that costly gift, and surely the measure I poured back was disappointing.
I remember the Lord asking me one day while I was getting ready in my bathroom. Why do you not think I will celebrate you? When your life is over, and you’re in my presence, why do you not think I will see the good that happened as a result of your life and celebrate all the love that was? I could not give him an answer. Even now, I anticipate and fear his reproach. I know these themes are not true. But perhaps I still feel like I need my own protection to beat him or anyone else to the punch.
I know I am safe with him. He is the safest place for me to exist in. He created me and knows everything about me. Not only the whats but the whys. The whys I can’t seem to figure out. My connection with him is something I know lives, but in confession, I don’t do much to foster its growth. I did, once. I complain more than I want to, and my heart is colder than I would like. I care less than I should, and I remember being more fun. I know the narrative of ‘this is just what getting older is like’ is a lie every time I encounter a 40 or 50-year-old with the twinkle of heaven’s joy in their eye. My perspective is my choice.
I shared this post to remind you of what God reminds me. I have a savior. He is good at his job. His promises to me are still real and still stand. I believe in Jesus Christ as my savior despite my failures and shortcomings. I love him, and I think he has asked me to write. These words may not be as chipper as they were ten years ago, but he is just as worthy, and I am still loved as much as I was then. I am still chosen. God is still hopeful. I am still his. He is still mine. And this is me at this time.
To leave you with his words and not my own, Romans 6:11 says, “And since grace is through God’s kindness, then it is not by their good works. For in that case, God’s grace would not be what it really is—free and undeserved.”
Invitation to Prayer – Death by a Fence
Hey Everyone! It’s been a million years since writing. I had a dream last night that I want to share for the purpose of praying together for the body of Christ.
I was looking down a dirt farm road and there were two large barns off to the left of this road right in front of me. Between these barns was a tall wire fence. This fence was stronger than the strength of a full size dam but it was still just a wire fence. I watched a heard of wild horses running full speed over these hills towards this fence from the left. There was no reduction in speed before they hit. The first died instantly, then the herd kept coming. They did not stop, the horses that hit first piled up dead at the front. The force with which these horses hit literally shook the earth I was standing on. It was a shocking and painful thing to watch.
As I awoke I understood that this fence was picture of running into offense in the heart of many powerful believers resulting in a lot of spiritual death. I do not know if this is offense at God or offense at men. I do not know whether this is happening now, has happened already or will happen. The force of offense resulting in spiritual death was shaking the earth.
Some sobering questions that arose within me from this picture are:
Am I operating out of offense toward another or others? Am I offended at God about something? Am I prepared if God moves in a way entirely against my expectation or understanding right now?
As I shared this dream out-loud, another verse grew in clarity for me. “The love of many will grow cold.” This came to mind not as a pessimistic outlook, but a sobering thermometer gauge of healthiness. This verse doesn’t say suddenly turn cold in an instant, it says “will grow cold.” When things grow in a field, it is a slow occurrence, little by little, over time, beyond the ability of a passing observant eye to even notice the growth. Loving the lord God with all your heart, mind, body, soul; receiving and experiencing the Love he first has for us is our walk of faith. This exchange of love is what everything else lives as an expression of; this is the healthy root of a thing. If we hate our brothers, we will be made into liars.
Thank you for prayers for the body of Christ that her heart would be protected against a great offense affecting many.
Is my love for man/God growing in this season? or growing cold? Return to my first L O V E
Dusting off the Stories of what God has Done
God is always the same and what he did once he would do again. God is not a respecter of persons and what he would do for one he would do for any. These two statement encourage the hope and possibility of what God did once for someone else, he would do for me. In saying that, something he did twenty years ago for me, he can do for you now. So I’m walking down the memory lane of life as it is always the front page of who God still is today. Take anything as hope of what can do for you.
- I trusted God with my love life and he brought me the most amazing husband any woman could ever dream of. As I’m writing this he is charging my cell phone for me and asking if I have water because he was going to refill it for me as I’m sitting in bed on a Saturday typing this about him.
- I’ve never made over $10,000 a year in my entire adult life yet God has financed sending me to 23 different countries over the course of my life. For whatever reason, the way my heart is wired is that I feel most romanced by God when he sends me to travel somewhere. I know I couldn’t, and wouldn’t want to do anything without him sending me.
- I’ve screwed up, meaning I’ve failed at something he’s asked me to do, and yet he’s never fired me, punished me, abandoned me or quit being kind to me. Because of this I really realized the grace of God is truly a gift. It is not earned.
- God redeemed the ending of my family when we were younger. My parents separated and both happily remarried. My siblings are all risking love in some measure in their life. This sometimes requires the greatest courage. I am proud for the measure they continue to risk being known and loved despite how we’ve seen it can possibly end up.
- God has given me peace. In different seasons of life due to different things I have different measures of peace but in all of life I have a strong underlying trust in God that always imparts to me a steadfastness that I feel all the time. Like I’m being held, or embraced, or hugged and I feel safe and sturdy. I love God for imparting this feeling to me on an ongoing basis.
- I realized through frequency to get over myself, my understanding, my ways, control, anything I would hold on to for fear or security. From plans to stuff, he really does take care of everything and often, when I let him, way better than I could ever put things together. Like I really am blind and dumb compared to all he sees and knows. It is wisdom to trust him, let him lead, and put everything in his hands.
- Unity, relationships, connection, obedience, service, humility, love, faith, truth, these things really are the majors in life and everything else is truly unimportant and meaningless in comparison.
- I really feel like my death is in God’s hands as much as my birth was. I didn’t control my birth, God did. In the same way, I don’t think anything is random and he knows all of the days of my life and will work out the plans and dreams he has for sending me here in the first place.
- I don’t fear death in any way. Almost daily I feel the fragility of this realm of life and time. It is such a thin veil and my true self is timeless and in an always state. I do not want to miss what he wants to show me and teach me and also truly enjoy the day with him as this is me loving to be alive with him. This is living.
- I feel humbled by God’s goodness and love. I definitely don’t deserve any of it, but he shows me that I’m worthy because he says I am. Who am I to disagree?! 😉
- I thought I was going to go into tangible stories about specifics God had done for me–
- Oh-my father’s transplant was an answer to prayer-he met my husband and is still alive!
- And also my grandfather’s life was spared in a time where he was being killed by being given the wrong medication in the hospital but the error was found out and he became himself again to pass in peace at a later time.
- Also I was filled with the holy spirit, a tangible experience in my body that overcame me that I still feel today and a way I interact with God directly spirit to spirit rather than just mind to mind, early morning alone in a gymnasium in a Lutheran church!
- I received God’s forgiveness and being made right with God through what Jesus Christ suffered on my behalf on the cross, making a way for me to stand blameless and confident before God because he has made me his family and his friend.
- I thought I was going to write more specific stories like the ones above, but it appears God is an active living miracle in my life. I am so grateful to have the ability to see and breathe and feel and taste and express myself and sit in peace and have freedom. I am so thankful to share life with my husband and spend the passing of time in his company.
These are a few thoughts that come to mind when thinking about what God has done for me in my life. May it be an encouragement and blessing to you. Oh yeah – don’t waste your time overly concerning yourself with what other people think of you. It is not your responsibility nor does it matter beyond your upright heart before the father. Acceptance or praise of man is not the bread that that gives life but rather the word of God. Blessings!
happyreign 